I drowned myself. Oh the symbolism.

(no subject)

I'm trying not to use the "maid of tears" IM name anymore, since I seem to get bombarded with spam on that account.

IM Websters3rd or celelube if you need me.
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    blah blah
I drowned myself. Oh the symbolism.

(no subject)

See, ever since the King of Sporkdor fucked off to suspiciousbox along with my shagging buddies entire family, it's been a pretty mundane existence here at Barliman's. I mean, sure, it's all right to use a Spork of Power every now and then to help you with your shows, but it gets old after a while--the same drunken geezers fondling their ferrets in the corner of the bar, and every night opening the same dirty linen closet to kick out the same group of hobbits.

I'd go on a Quest, but I'm really lazy not a fan of the idea of coming back without a finger, Frodo-style. Although it does make for a perfect stripper name. Nini of the Nine Fingers, at your service, yo.

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    The Breaking of the Fellowship
I drowned myself. Oh the symbolism.

Why I love mikefox

1. He embraces my incestuous nature
2. He writes me songs
3. He likes to shag me
4. He appreciates a good poetry slam and/or strip show
5. He has disturbingly intense fans
6. He lets me be his groupie
7. He was created as a hobbit fucktoy. How cool is that?
8. He did not break my heart, of course well, maybe a little
9. He was imprisoned by Bubba the Glut
10. He shares his birthday (TODAY!!!) with Peter the Great
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I drowned myself. Oh the symbolism.

Nini's Rules of Life

1. Love your family, because you never realize how important they are to you.
2. Take #1 in whatever way you want.
3. Rocks and water are not so pretty when you are smashed to a pulp on them.
4. Even with a name that literally translates to "Mourning Maid of Tears", nothing is stopping you from getting a little fun out of life. I think.
5. When you're doing a striptease, the hidden spork will *always* fall out of the lingerie at the most inopportune times. Some people, however, find this arousing.
6. You never get remembered for authoring the original suggestion of Boromir/Faramir.
7. Gríma is one persistent fucker.
8. One can spend a lifetime exploring the anatomy of the ferret.
9. Everything good you've heard about Michael J. Fox's sexpertise is probably true. ;)
10. Cesium + water = BIG FUCKING EXPLOSION = Elladan - his arm.

Since the wedding's postponed, anyway...Elendil, up for a date?
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    Brahms Piano Quintet
I drowned myself. Oh the symbolism.

(no subject)

I am going to be a bridesmaid or something if Elrohir accepts and all of that!

This means I won't be in the Shire for as long as I planned (unless they hold the wedding at Bag End; that wouldn't be too bad as that sexy tree is there), but I don't want to ditch you. So...Elendil, how about being my date to the wedding?

Look at how assertive I am getting. Next thing you know I'll be playing with explosives again. Wait, never mind, already done that.
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    cheerful cheerful
I drowned myself. Oh the symbolism.

off to the shire

Stripping only takes your mind away from it all for so long.

I mean, yeah, it's fun and all, trying to decide exactly what should come off first and to what extent and what rhythm and which articles of clothing should be hurled into the raucous crowd at the PP. It's quite a challenge, mind you.

But, of course, everything gets old sometime.

I think the last time I left the PP, Elrohir invited me to Rivendell and from there I traveled to Celemawë where the whole cesium thing happened and...yeah. Although come to think of it, those were rather exciting times. Not that I want to go back to those days of Elladan losing arms and stuff.

Maybe I'll go to the Shire, or something. I remember being around there when I first got out of Mandos, and when borntoramble forged The One Spork.

elendilthetall, though, if you ever want to take me up on that drink...
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    pensive pensive